OrganiSed Chaos

Indeed, it’s the time of the week when we attempt to make you giggle, gurgle, gyrate and spit.
Malarky Monday!
Not too sure where the last 7 days have gone, but gone they are.
Monday is a bitch of a day for most people as they look down the barrel of another week involving kids, work, that bastard thing called life in general and when Friday seems a bloody long away away, so we like to see you at least smile if nothing else.
Now, when I say we, that of course includes my madcap cohorts in Mark, ~m and DILLIGAF, so be sure to go visit once you’re done chortling here {did I just say chortling??? WTF?? my brain must be fried I think}
This week from me is not only a giggle, but in fact it’s educational as well.
I kid you not my friends.
It’s a lesson you could use to explain sexuality to your kids when they start getting curious.
No awkward conversation will be needed, just show them these instead!
Check these out!

Some fairy dust for Miss Stella as she goes home today.
Yes, after more than 3 long weeks, finally the words we’ve been waiting to hear.
As I type, she is having the stitches out of her knee.
Her drip was the first thing to go, which I’m sure she was pleased to see the back of.
I know her mother was, and so are we.
I’m not able to express what I’m feeling, but I can tell you it’s very warm and fuzzy inside me right now.
There have been many sleepless nights, unwanted thoughts and worries, and that’s just Mark and I.
As a parent, I can only imagine the emotional roller coaster Tash and Stick have been on, and that’s not to mention the logistics of the last 3 weeks.
There are 4 children in the family I speak of, and a father who has needed to be all things to the 3 boys while Tash was with Stella in hospital, one of which was quite some distance from home.
Tonight I’ll sleep well knowing this precious little girl is home in her own bed, and that Tash will be able to tuck all the kids in before she goes to sleep in her own bed, safe in the knowledge her family are where they belong.
Together and at home.
Mark, it was only a few hours late, but you did get that phone call you wanted so badly

Happy birthday my precious.
I hope your day is full of nothing but sunshine and smiles, and that you get that phone call you want so badly.
Tonight we shall wine and dine, and, well, let’s leave the rest unsaid shall we?
Don’t want to be upsetting the kiddies now do we???
Having said that, I’m sure the picture already has them covering their eyes!

53?
And here was you thinking it would be a lucky thing if you got to 50.
Enjoy your day {and your night} and know I look forward to celebrating many more of your birthdays with you.
Always remember, I love you no matter what.
Now, most of you would think that’s the end of the post, yes?
Wrong.
It’s someone else’s birthday as well.
A special friend I found through blogging has a birthday today as well{yes, blogging has been very good to me}
I find it ironic I’ve never known anyone who has a birthday on the same day as Mark until I met her too.
Blondie, I hope your day is relaxing, full of family, love and good food, and that your night is X rated!!!
Have a good one honey.
*mwah*
Love you.
I got you a pressie, and he even bought his own rubber with him!
Hope you like him!

It’s been quite the week in our house, so the idea of MM and some damned good belly laughs appealed to me more than you know.
Sick children, vanishing blogs and stock takes to come had me quite the gibbering idiot.
Some would say I’m like that anyway, but they never say it loud enough for me to hear mind you!!
MM this week is all about misfortune as reported in newspapers around the world, and a couple of these nearly bloody killed me!
Couldn’t breath, tears, coughing fit, the whole enchilada.
I know it’s not considered polite to laugh at others misfortunes, but these are just too damned funny not to laugh, and I defy you NOT to laugh!! 

Once you’re done here, be sure to visit my cohorts in ~m, Burnie and DILLIGAF

Click on the pics to get a better read if you’re having trouble

The first one gives a whole new meaning to shrinkage!

Oh yes, it’s all good fun till someone gets their willy bitten!!

Clearly this woman wanted her supermarket experience to be a bit of a buzz!!

Great balls of fire!!

Little Miss Stella has been in hospital for 10 days, much to everyone’s dismay.
What started as a temperature due to an infection in her knee joint has morphed into 2 operations, an IV for antibiotics, painkillers, regular blood tests, and now, a blood transfusion.
When I’m troubled, worried, or distressed, or if something comes from deep inside me, I use fairies.
This fairy is for a very precious little girl.
We don’t see a lot of Tasha’s 4 children, but we were lucky enough to spend a week with them at Christmas.
Inside 5 minutes this little minx had wrapped us around her little finger.
She is not the apple of her mothers eye.
Oh no!
In her mothers words “She’s the whole bloody tree”
The youngest of 4, and the only girl.
An unexpected little girl in a family of boys, and oh so very, very loved.
This fairy is to keep her safe, help her heal, send her home to her loving parents and brothers, and to put this trying time behind her.
Tash has been beside her every step of the way, and the strength she has shown is nothing less than remarkable, and makes me swell with pride.
To see another of my daughters go through hell with one of their children has me sleepless, restless and decidedly difficult to get along with.
Being so far away is very difficult, and I’ve had to fight the urge to fly down.
With Mel it was different.
I could be there and hold her when she needed to be held, soothe if I could and give her a shoulder to lean on.
Not this time.
Maybe with the posting of Stella’s fairy, sleep will come, fairy dust will surround this precious little girl and hopefully some magic will help her, and her mother, along?
I pray it does.

Malarky Monday is upon us with the speed of a wounded duck.
I no sooner seem to do one of these than it’s time to do another!
Having said that, we can never laugh too much so perhaps the quicker it gets here the better do you think?
**thinking hard on that one**
Bugger it, it’s Monday, and a person can only handle the odd deep philosophical question on the first day of the work week, and it’s all too much for me, so we shall move to the gut busting giggles for this week, 2 of which are jokes for you pass along and share with your nearest and dearest, with the last one being the obligatory man with pussy cos guy’s just love them!.

Once you’re done here, don’t forget to visit my fellow malarkiers in Mark, Michael and DILLIGAF.
They’re sure to serve up some rippers!

The priest in a small Irish village loved his rooster and ten hens he kept in the hen house behind the church.
One Sunday morning, before mass, he went to feed the birds and discovered that the cock
was missing.
He knew about cock fights in the village, so he questioned his parishioners in church.
During mass, he asked the congregation, ‘Has anybody got a cock?’
All the men stood up.
‘No, no,’ he said, ‘that wasn’t what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?’
All the women stood up.
‘No, no,’ he said, ‘that wasn’t what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn’t belong to them?’
Half the women stood up.
‘No, no,’ he said, ‘that wasn’t what I meant. Has anybody seen MY cock?’
Sixteen altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up.

Paddy was walking along the street in Dublin when he rounds a corner and there’s a high rise building on fire.
Being the kind-hearted Irishman, he runs up to the building to see if he can help and notices people trapped 5 stories up.
Paddy yells to the people ‘I’m Patrick Sean Michael Fitzpatrick’, the Irish Rugby Union fullback, if you jump I’ll catch you.’
One lady, in desperation, jumps and sure enough Paddy catches her.
Then a man sees that Paddy catches the women and jumps.
Sure enough Paddy catches him safely.
Then a black man jumps out and falls to the ground, Paddy didn’t even attempt to catch him. Paddy looked up and yelled.
“Don’t throw out the fooken’ burnt ones!”