Burden
Has anyone noticed the older they get, the more of a burden they become on young people.
That’s maybe a little obscure so allow me to elaborate with an example?
Mark and I have just been down to the supermarket to grab a few things so I can do the slow cooker thing before I go to work in the morning {yes, in 2 days we’ve become absolutely besotted with the damn thing, but I digress…sorry!}
We grab the odds and sods we need, then head to the checkout.
One girl is at her register, light on, cleaning.
Looking like I might be going to put my things from the basket onto the belt she says “Sorry, I’m closed”
I look up, yep, the light is on, I’m not seeing things.
“Perhaps you might like to turn your light off then so people know?”
**exaggerated sigh** turns the light off and continues to clean all while giving me a “silly old woman” look.
Down to the express checkout.
3 of them here, all having a nice little chat.
Yep, good start!
Items on the bench.
All 5 of them mind you.
Looks at me, looks at Mark, looks at the items, and at a snails pace picks up the first one.
Still chatting.
Not even hello mind you.
Scans one item, puts it down.
Still chatting.
Scans 2nd item, puts it down.
Still chatting.
We go through this painful little exercise for all items, all put back on the bench, no bag.
Doesn’t even look at me and says “$6.90″
Not please.
Nothing other than “$6.90″
Me, being me, says “Sorry, how much??”
**exaggerated sigh** {seems this is part of the key selection criteria to work in a supermarket these days!!}
“$6.90……………………………………please?”
Very good thinks I.
She got it.
So I give her $10.00 and am duly given $3.10 change.
All this while she’s still chatting {and giggling} with the other 2.
So I wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Items are still on the bench, not in a bag and not showing any signs of getting in one any time soon.
Chatting.
Giggling.
Finally, she gets it, they’re put in a bag and we can get out of there, away from what was a quite painful experience, yet should have been an easily accomplished task.
Buying 5 damned things in the supermarket.
Yes, seemingly we, as customers, are burdens to young ones, and do little other than interrupt the social life which seems to go hand in hand with working in a supermarket these days.
Fuckwits!
Topics: Australia, FFS!, Food, Spare me, bullshit, pissed off | 3 Comments »
Dreaming
Dreams are strange happenings.
We don’t understand why we have them, yet most people do.
Their purpose has been an unanswered question for long as history has been recorded.
No, I don’t have the answer, but I can tell you there is a trigger for my dreams {as I type that, I can hear my 3 girls as a chorus}
PORK!!!
I kid you not. Pork.
Ordinarily, I lucid dream, which can be quite the advantage should a dream not be to my liking.
However, when the dream is triggered by pork, I lose the ability to know it’s a dream, thus I can’t wake myself up.
Pork dreams {as I call them in my head} are 100% nonsensical.
Most of them are the better than any comedy show you could watch, joke you can hear, or indeed any science fiction show you would see.
To give you an idea of what I mean when I say nonsensical, I’ll give you a small list of the bizarre things that appear, and happen, in my pork dreams.
Life sized purple grasshoppers
Jumbo jet size psychedelic orange flies
Living on a bright green planet in space with Klingon or Cardassian neighbours
Running through a field of canary yellow trees while being pursued by a 4 headed t rex
These are but a small taste of the things that come to me while I sleep.
Lucid dreaming is a strange thing.
If I’m having a nightmare {not uncommon} then I know it’s a nightmare and I can wake myself up.
On the other hand, should I be having a pleasant dream, the very second it occurs to me that it’s a dream, I wake up without wanting to.
Most frustrating.
As I get a little older, I’m finding it’s not only pork which will trigger strange dreams.
If we have a later than normal dinner and it includes something spicy, the same thing will happen.
They may not be on the same bizarre level as they are with pork as yet, however as time goes by, I find them slowly becoming just as odd.
I was wondering if I’m the only one who has dream triggers.
I’m certainly not making an attempt to work out why we dream, what meaning they have or indeed how they occur, this is merely something I thought I’d throw out there.
Topics: Food, Home, Insight, bizarre | 5 Comments »
Peace of mind
This is doubtlessly obscure for many, however, those involved will know, and from where I sit, that’s enough.
For some time life on both work and personal levels has been odd.
It’s not been horrendous, but it’s not been right either.
Disjointed comes immediately to mind if I was to describe the feeling in a single word.
It’s not been just one thing though, it’s more the culmination of several situations, both professionally and personally.
The things I speak of have created uncertainty, dismay, bewilderment, pain and a feeling of helplessness due mainly to them being out of our control, and a dependency on others.
Yes, we’ve had 2 brilliant holidays, our health is good and we’ve had many, many good things happen, but these have always had shadows on them.
While these shadows haven’t tarnished the good things, there has been some looking over our shoulders and wondering where it would all end.
I’m pleased to say, this week much has been resolved on all levels.
On the personal side of the coin, events have not only surprised us, they have also bought a level of contentment, an inner peace, smiles, and tears.
At work, much uncertainty has been removed, many more things are clear in our future and we can see much of what life will have to offer in that regard.
We can now move forward with a purpose in both environments.
Where previously we were struggling to see beyond dark clouds stretching endlessly, now the sky is clear and blue with the promise of only better things to come.
To those who are aware of these things, I know you will be discreet in your comments.
For others, be happy and smile for us?
It’s rare in my life I’ve been free of at least one situation guaranteed to create a dark spot.
As I write today, I can say there’s not one to be seen.
My hope is it will stay that way, but even if it doesn’t, I’ll always be able to look back to today and smile.
Peace of mind is something we all desire, and I have every intention of embracing it while it’s there.
I have high hopes of being able to embrace it for quite some time too.
Can you hear the contented sigh?
I’m thinking you can, because it’s quite emphatic.
I hope your weekend has been as kind to you as mine has to me.
Enjoy what you have left of it as I intend to enjoy mine.
Topics: Australia, Blessed, Busy, Home, Hope, Humor, Insight, Reflection, family, feelings, life | 3 Comments »
An invisible neon sign
It would seem I have an invisible neon sign on my head.
Problem here is I’m the only one it’s invisible to.
I say that because apparently it’s quite clear to almost every one of the following people:
Froot loops who travel on any form of public transport.
Those who eye you off from a distance with a decided look of distrust for around 30 seconds,then…….BAM!
They’re sitting beside you sprouting forth garbage which would make no sense to anyone, in a low, guttural tone designed to make every hair on your body stand up, and will have you checking the bed for a horses head before you get in at night.
Those who have no friends {in Oz we refer to this type as a Neville Nobody}
These are the people who smell like socks or jocks that have never been changed, or how I imagine a camels arse would smell {should I ever have any desire to get close to one that is!}
Wonder if it ever occurs to them this is why they have no friends??
I seriously doubt it.
God botherers.
Now, I’m not an overly religious person, but neither am I an atheist. Having said that, it amuses me no end how there are many who would accost you in the street to assure you the end is nigh, Jesus is on their left shoulder, and that if I don’t repent right now, my soul will be lost forever {I generally give them a heads up that sometimes the thought of eternal rest appeals to me, my soul was lost many years ago, and the devil on my right shoulder is gonna kick their Jesus’s arse!}
I don’t need to be lectured by some holier than thou twerp on my spiritual beliefs, but they seemingly think I need guidance
Even in supermarkets I seem to attract people who have no desire to do anything other than whinge about grocery prices, the lack of customer service, and have an apparent need to impart stories of days gone by where they could not only shop but enjoy it, and how their very last chook keeled over and now they have need to buy eggs for the first time in 20 years.
I’m not entirely sure why they think I could give 2 hoots or a rats arse, but I’ll tell you this.
As soon as I can get my hands on that damned neon sign, I’m going to shove it where the sun doesn’t shine on the next moron who decides my face is one that welcomes any drop kick, loser or mealy mouthed twerp I come across!
Topics: Australia, Dicks!, FFS!, Newsflash, Spare me, feelings, life | 6 Comments »
Always 2 sides
For every tale told, there’s 2 sides.
Despite this fact, there are those who would only ever think to give you one side of the story.
These are the people who, at every turn, would attempt to garner sympathy with their side.
I’ve generally found their side to be told in such a way as to make them seem the down trodden victim of said story, when if truth be known, they actually contributed to the way things turned out.
These are the people who bitch and whinge about not knowing what they did wrong, and always want to know why they were {seemingly} treated in such a poor manner.
Here’s a red hot tip for the people such as these, and let me be utterly non diplomatic about this {just for something different}
Ask the fucking question.
Don’t whinge and whine in cryptic terms to all and sundry in an effort to look like a door mat.
Ask the fucking question
Anyone who knows anything about me will tell you.
If you want an answer, ask the fucking question.
Having said that, you’d best be prepared for the answer, because I don’t mince words, I tell it the way it is, and you will have your answer.
But no.
It’s easier to bitch and whinge in one place yet stay silent in the other apparently.
Easier to portray themselves as a lamb to the slaughter.
{And what a crock of shit that portrayal generally is}
Ordinarily with the people I speak of, there is never a word amidst their tale of the efforts made by others to include them in everything regardless of their own lack of enthusiasm.
Never a word of the offers made to make it easy for them in every way possible.
Oh no, it’s always easier to play the martyr and do poor poor pitiful me.
So if you’re a person who only ever tells one side of the story, remember.
There are those who know the full story, and that could be why the people you tell say little when you only tell them your side.
Topics: Newsflash | 4 Comments »
Beacons
Of late my mind is quite strange.
I can hear some people saying this is perfectly normal for me, to them I would say screw you, that’s not what I mean and you know it!
I’m referring not so much to my state of mind, but rather how it’s been going off on it’s own little tangents without any warning.
Today it’s firmly entrenched in what I refer to as life altering times.
Moments of clarity which stay with you forever, and have the ability to change your entire life or the way you think, whether you want to or not.
These are moments that force changes, sometimes good, others not so good.
I’ll admit life is in a constant state of change for most people, and in that respect, I’m no different.
I am grateful that as a person I’m able to adapt to these things.
If we couldn’t adapt, we would drown in life itself I believe.
I’ve had many moments of clarity in my life, and every one of those moments is as clear today as the day they happened, so I thought to share just a few of the most important ones with you.
These are not in chronological order, they’re more in one of impact.
Obviously, the very first thing that comes to mind is the death of my mother.
There are few events in a 13 year old’s life which would have the impact this did.
Her death set off a chain of events that essentially shaped the rest of my life, because I can assure you, as a female, growing from a teenager to an adult without a mother to guide you is at best, difficult.
You have noone to point you in the right direction, nor anyone to advise you what’s right and wrong morally or physically, so the chance of making mistakes is higher than average.
My biggest regret, other than the obvious loss, is doubtlessly missing out on seeing her with my children and in turn, their children.
Enough said on that one I think.
Second in line is another death, that of my grandfather.
Although I only had him for a short time {6 1/2 years} it was long enough to create a bond that has, in my heart, lasted to today, and in fact I can still conjure the feeling of safety he engendered in me.
Yes I’ll freely admit, I miss him badly even though he’s been gone for 46 years {that’s absolutely the little girl talking there isn’t it??}
My father remarrying so early after the death of my mother {6 months later} is once again, an event that helped shape the rest of my life.
I refuse to go into details, suffice to say at {many} times, it’s been a decidedly unpleasant scenario, one which continues even today and still impacts on the relationship I have with my father.
It goes without saying the births of my children were 100% life altering, and again, still effects my life every single day, but in a good way, as I’m sure every parent would agree it does.
As a parent, we see our children as our babies, regardless of age, however, if you seriously want to see them as adults, watch them give birth.
Mark and I were privileged to be present when Zoe was born, and in fact I cut her cord, but I can assure you, it is not something I am in any hurry to repeat!
My pride in seeing how Kelly dealt with childbirth knows no bounds, however it was a moment of clarity like no other.
No more could I ever think of her as a girl.
She was, from that moment forward, without doubt, a woman.
Yes, she is still my little girl in some ways because they always need their mother {as did I many times through my life} but she’s not my little girl any more.
Quite contradictory I know, but truthful all the same.
It was no different other than the geography when Tasha and Melissa became mothers.
No more were they my babies.
With babies of their own, they were no longer apprentice people as I see young adults.
They were fully fledged.
I believe watching our children grow presents most of our life altering times.
It gives us an insight into how our parents felt watching us grow, and it it also gives us a greater appreciation of what our parents did in times which were not easy by today’s standards, and in some cases, the sacrifices they made.
In my adult life, besides the girls becoming mothers, the one thing that stands out head and shoulders above everything else is the day I met Mark.
I can recall every single detail and word from that day almost 16 years ago.
You want to talk about life altering, well let me tell you, I cannot begin to describe the difference it’s made to my life.
The good that has come from not only meeting, but marrying him?
Not possible to list them all here.
He is my sun, moon and stars and I love him beyond reason, no matter what.
Other things that come to mind are far away people I’ve met in recent years.
I credit these people with many positive things in my life as well.
A new way of thinking, seeing and believing are but some of the off shoots, and again, I couldn’t begin to tell you the ways this has shaped my life of late.
There have been more but the ones I have here are the big ones, those which have had the biggest impact.
Feel free to voice some of the beacons in your life, but please don’t feel obligated.
To speak of these things is not easy as I well know, but my mind has been rampant with them lately, and I needed to get them out there in the hope it will silence my mind.
I hope your weekend is treating you as well as mine is being to me.
Topics: Australia, Change, Death, Faith, Friends, Home, Hope, Insight, Reflection, family, feelings, life, love | 1 Comment »
